Prison Literature

You can often spot a gremlin by the books he reads (if he’s literate). Forget Tom Clancy or Dean Koontz – those guys are far too sophisticated for the average gremlin. Instead, they prefer to read tiny little novellas in a genre known as “hood books.”

Whoever came out with the first of these is clearly EVIL because hood books are designed to attract the lowest common denominator (gremlins), and to keep them firmly anchored to a criminal lifestyle. Who could forget timeless classics such as Stackin’ Paper and Court in the Streets? :P  All that these books have to offer are epic amounts of drugs, crime and violence. I think it’s sad that a lot of drug dealers can’t even IMAGINE a life different from the one that they were leading.

Thankfully, there are not many of these books at my current prison, due to the fact that there are wonderfully few gremlins here. I still see the hood books on occasion, though, and I shake my head in disapproval every time.

I’m happy to see that sci-fi and fantasy books are the overwhelming favorites in a prison mostly occupied by s.o.’s. It gives me more to choose from. ^_^  Also, if you ask the right people about a particular sci-fi or fantasy series, you’re bound to find it (privately owned) on the compound.

The library often has gaps in the most popular series of books due to the fact that when people get sent to the hole, all of their library books go with them. Usually these books end up getting shipped out with them, or they get added to the book cart that cycles through the hole every week. Inmate librarians aren’t allowed to retrieve library-owned books from the hole, and since the cops never care, the hole becomes a black hole for books. So if you want to read ALL of a series, you either need money to get the books for yourself, or you have to have connections.

Recently, I became a HERO when I had a friend send me books twelve and thirteen of The Wheel of Time. It’s a pretty popular series, and the library didn’t have the two most recent titles. One guy almost started drooling when he saw Towers of Shadow in hardcover. There’s not a lot to do in prison, so reading is serious business here.

I highly suspect that when I’m released, I’ll be very, very well read. Books are fun, and it’s a shame that it took a trip to prison to reawaken my love for reading.